4 Hours

For the past 3 nights, I have gotten an average of 4 hours of sleep each night. It is not enough. I rested my mornings away each time, stuck in a trap of tiredness. This morning isn’t much different… awake for the past 2 hours and the sky finally has a pale bluish tint peeping through my curtains. I should try to fall asleep before the sun rises.

I think my foray into Tryptophan may be over. I have loved the better rest I was getting, despite the 4 hr thing. I sleep deeper and wake better rested but my heart-chest tightness has increased. I stopped taking the thyroid support supplement this week to see if it was causing it but it’s still been an issue. So tonight, I won’t take the Tryptophan either. My blood pressure is good so I think it is just anxiety. I just haven’t struggled so frequently, consistently, with it until after starting these two new supplements.

Life as a Guinea pig of my own making…

Another wobble on my depression spiral — I called and made an appointment with my doctor for my mental health. I can’t get in until early next week. It feels like a necessary setback. I am resigned to going back on medication to cope.

I have a C-PTSD workbook coming in that I am hopeful will help me. And I will be looking into the Psalms for God’s counsel. A new chapter of my healing journey begins…

The sun is about to rise. ♡

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